Boulder Noir: Episode #? Dumpster Diving for The Alternate Boulder
Frank was a few blocks away from his office hiding behind a dumpster and puffing hard.” I’ve got to get in better shape,” he thought.
He had hit the ground, or to be specific the fire escape, as soon as he exited the window of his third floor office and had made it several blocks before he needed oxygen.
Over the din of his breathing he heard “Psst”.
“What again,” he thought. Looking over his shoulder towards the source of the sound he saw the shadow in the dumpster.
“Quick, get in”.
“The dumpster? We’re just going to hide in a dumpster?”
“Not exactly, it’s kind of like an alternate universe without the universe part but I don’t have time to explain just get in.”
Having no choice Frank gracefully tumbled into the dumpster. Instead of landing amid refuse and assorted detritus he found himself landing on soft grass. Looking up he appeared to be along side a bridge next to the Boulder Creek. What the fudge , hard boiled detectives don’t swear. Sure they may fire off their gun when they don’t have to but they don’t swear. Don’t ask me just go with it.
“Psst”
Frank looked around for the shadow because by now he figured that’s who it was.
Surprisingly he found him right where a shadow should be, under the bridge among the other shadows.
“What the heck? Is this an alternative universe? How the heck does that work,” asked Frank. “Magic?”
“Don’t be silly,” said the shadow “there is no such thing.”
“Ok I’ll begrudgingly accept that but how did you do that.”
“Well, time flows like a river. Sometimes water forms eddies and pools around transient objects and allow for something wonderful to be exposed or to join the river itself.”
“Yea you’ve mentioned that before but there is no where in that nice little speech that tells me how I can jump into a dumpster in Downtown Boulder and end up several blocks away. Is the dumpster a transporter?”
“Transporter, um, nicely put.”
“Yea Star Trek had a big impact on our culture but cut to the chase.”
“Cut to the ….Oh yes. Um, would you believe small earthbound worm holes?”
“Well, it’s not magic but let’s go with that.”
“It’s like parallel universes on one planet and with the same universe.”
“You’re making it more convoluted. Stick with the earthbound worm holes.”
“Ok, I’ll accept that.”
“But why is it that I and seemingly everyone else have no clue about these earthbound worm holes, which I will call EWH because as a human in the twenty-first century I must use an acronym for something related to science or technology, lest my attention span get’s lost like a dog losing focus to a running squirrel.”
“Only a very few beings and some people can sense them.”
“A few people? So why are they still secret?”
“Because those people are either institutionalized or shunned as being mentally unbalanced.”
“That explains it. We tend to shun what we don’t understand. There’s a lot of shunning going on in society.”
“Yes, there is an awful lot of it. It’s used a coping mechanism to avoid the complicated issues or the things that don’t fit into your simplified view of the world.”
“I think I’m insulted.”
“Don’t be you’re not alone.”
“Ok, I’ll accept that. Thanks for helping me out when I was caught in the rain.”
“But it is not raining”
“It’s an expression it means I was in a jam. You know, in trouble.”
“Oh, my pleasure, you seem like you need help when you’re ‘caught in the rain.’ You haven’t been a detective long have you?”
“No but I’ll get the hang of it. In the meantime I appreciate the help in a squeeze.”
“Squeeze? Oh yes, not a problem.”
“I have to cheese it. I’m not far enough away from those guys to be comfortable.”
“Oh yes by all means cheese it. I’m sure I’ll see you again.”
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